Failing Forward

I am still learning to write a book, and it’s not as easy as I originally thought. The other side of failure is always success. I believe in a balance and that even though I failed in my expectations, I succeeded in learning a lot about myself. The Tropical Creator is temporarily on hold.

Originally, I had certain ideas about what I could share. The first outline was very promising. Then I started filling in my ideas and opinions that I thought were valuable. Not too long afterwards, it began looking like a frankenstein guide book to hacking random unrelated things. It didn’t flow as I originally planned.

Unfortunately, inspiration isn’t an abundant waterfall of words that I gracefully catch on my laptop with sparkles and glitter exploding every time I finish a chapter. More often than not, it’s like waiting for rain to appear from a cloudless sky. Sometimes it comes. Sometimes it doesn’t.

Even as I try to discipline myself into writing, I keep finding myself asking why I am writing this book. A continuous question that begs me to stop forcing things. Because too often, I was forcing the book, or going beyond what I was ready to share.

How I messed up

I announced the book publicly too early – without having a clear definition of what I really wanted to write for people. Here’s a helpful hint: the book title should be chosen near the end of completion, not before it’s written.

I want to write from a deep place of feeling. Feeling good and flowing as it comes. Feeling confident that I am able to speak on these things from experience and that I’m making sense along the way. For me, I am having a lot of self doubts.

I placed too much pressure on myself to create something that wasn’t ready to be created – yet. Stepping back from the book project over the past two weeks has been very beneficial. Since then, I have created and launched an entirely new project that’s been growing in my mind for over a year now – Meditation for Entrepreneurs, a simple meditation course for busy web professionals. The course has been a huge success, with over a thousand people enrolling within the first few days.

The break was needed and it’s allowed great things to be created. Now as I return home from Bangkok, I have new ideas and focus points. I’ll be the first to admit that I probably have entrepreneurial ADHD, but I am doing my best to balance. To keep a balance between ideation and action. No problem, it’s all a learning process – and I would rather have the courage to pivot quickly than to continue doing something that didn’t feel good anymore. It’s all about feeling good, no matter what other people think of me.

It’s all good

At first I kind of beat myself up about pausing the book project, but after speaking with my friend on Skype, she helped me let go of the judgement. We all learn and grow from what we do and what happens.

I learned that the next time I approach this project (which I do plan on continuing next year), I will tread more carefully. I won’t force any content. I will allow myself time. I will encourage patience. And I definitely won’t make any announcements until it’s basically finished. :)

Also, the next title won’t be about me becoming a millionaire anymore – because it’s not about the money, it’s about feeling good. It’s not about a sensational title, it’s about writing something that matters. The millions are just a side effect.

Thanks for following my journey.

Cheers,
-Tharyn