The idea of enlightenment is much more grandiose than the actual experience. Moreover, the term itself limits the full spectrum of each person’s individual experience of enlightenment. It is unique to each individual. Stop looking for someone else’s version of enlightenment and begin tuning into your own. You know it when you feel it. You are your own unique God unto all that is.
Expectation
As I’ve read, sought, and practiced various traditions and practices in order to induce this elusive state, I’ve never quite grasped that expectation in my head. I was always reaching for an illusion in my own mind.
And now, even today, as I have walked in and out of my own enlightenment, it was not like anything I could have read in a book or been taught by another. It was my own experience. And it will continue to evolve as my own.
The waterfall
It was a Sunday afternoon. I was walking in nature and planning my life. Always thinking, planning, needing to do stuff. I was tired of it. That’s why I was outside in the first place – to relax and let go. I gradually let go of the need to be productive and just enjoyed my surroundings while focusing into my heart.
There was no real beginning nor ending. It’s impossible to classify in those terms. It was like coming back into my most natural and normal self here in the moment. It was a very present focused experience. Like pulling my fingers out of all the pies of work, life, desires, future, hobbies, chores, and everything in the world. Yet the world stood around me. I was in the middle of my present moment world with calm clarity.
All of it was just here. Inside me was the Whole. But inside me is a strange way to put it. It doesn’t translate into words, because the present moment is actually inside of my consciousness – I am not inside the present moment. Just as it has been said before, the soul is not inside the body, for the body is inside the soul.
It was nice. It was calm. It was like realizing there is a waterfall of love constantly pouring into me. And I thought to myself, how might I capture it, put the water in a jar, and save it for later? Then I laughed, realizing how silly that would be when the waterfall is always right here.
Holding on
It went away, for now. It will come again, right now. I saw how unnecessary it was to hold on to, like I try to hold on to other things in the external world. I wanted to hold on to it like I do with money, love, respect, reputation, or anything else I might use to leverage my identity. Like I wanted to use it again when it suited my needs.
However, unlike those things, this one cannot be lost. Therefore, I let go of the need to have it. It is always there to provide. It is never ending abundance. It is literally the source every good feeling that I thought the outside world was giving me.
Nope, the source of good feelings comes from within.
Feeling good
It felt good and that was all. Good and natural. That’s how it manifested in that moment. I have no doubt that it can change shapes into all sorts of experiences, as the mystics of old have described, but for now, in that moment, it just was. It just was what it was.
It’s too simple for words. It’s too built up in our minds. Nonetheless, it’s a jolly good time to enjoy.
I know it is there. I know who it is too – it’s Me. It’s God with a capital G. It’s Source with a capital S. It’s who I Am. Not as a separate entity or consciousness, but as a singular beingness.
It will come and go. I’m not worried about it. When I feel good, I know I am more of my natural self and it’s literally that simple.
When I feel good, I feel God… but not just feel God, I become the conscious awareness that I am Source enjoying itself. That’s what feeling good means. Perhaps enlightenment for me was the simple reminder of exactly that.
Simplicity is good. Feeling good is good. All is well and I know the waterfall is ever flowing.
Your own enlightenment
Enlightenment for you may be completely unique or different from this. You are your own infinite sliver of All That Is. Do not be tricked into the hype of enlightenment or ascending into some mystical state of prophethood. That’s probably not going to happen.
I write with candor about my experiences because it feels good. I enjoy sharing my spiritual journey with others who are interested. However, do not be fooled that I am somehow superior in any way. Do not be fooled that Jesus, Buddha, or anyone is superior in evolution than you are. The mere idea that they are somehow more worthy in the eyes of God or better than you means that you have misunderstood their core message. You are worthy and equal beyond description.
We are all One and there cannot be an unworthy fragment of perfect infinite consciousness among us. You are part of that perfection and it is perfection you have inherited. Enlightenment is simply lining up vibrationally with the truth that Source is already knowing and holding for you.
Enlightenment is not attained, it is a given.
