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How To Deal With Stubborn People

Have you ever met someone who you thought was clearly wrong? They were being a complete idiot and had no self control or self awareness whatsoever? And you wondered how could they possibly not see their glaring error? Maybe they have really bad habits. Maybe the way they do that thing just bothers you. They are so wrong. If you’ve ever encountered this experience, then read on to see how you are the one who is suffering more for their error than they are.

I’ve noticed this lesson arising in my own life and I thought I would write about it just incase you were facing these same situations. It’s a paradoxical and very difficult lesson to see clearly. Let me explain.

There are two main factors

1. Feeling good is what’s most important in any given moment.

2. No matter how wrong they are, you can not be right enough for it to feel good. Your rightness is an empty victory.

Take a moment to think about this and then continue reading.

No matter how justified you are in all of your logical reasons, none of your thoughts or understandings belong to the person who is wrong. They are going through their own lessons and experiences. They are coming from their own unique perspective. Nothing you do or say will liberate them from their situation.

How I realized it in my own life

I began noticing myself get into hypothetical arguments with this person about how terribly ignorant their actions were. These little tirades were entirely for my own satisfaction of being right in my own head – a completely empty satisfaction. My arguments will not make them change, but they are still going on in my head. MY OWN HEAD.

I realized this was pure insanity. To let someone else hold dominion inside my own thoughts based on HOW WRONG THEY ARE. Seriously? Brain? You are doing this to me right now? Well, not anymore. I saw you. I saw your own shenanigans.

Feeling good is the key to holding a vibration which will bring about a positive future experience. That is creation at it’s essence. Feeling good is all that matters.

Now I see, that I can not be right enough to feel good about the situation. I can not be justified in my own reasoning enough to feel good about it. In fact, the primary reason I want that person to see my logic and change, is so that I can feel better when I look at them.

You can not be right enough

You may find many people in life who are wrong or misguided (from your point of view) and you can justify how wrong they are all you want. However, the faster you let go of those negative aspects and instead focus on the positive aspects of that person, the faster you will align with better feeling thoughts. And better feeling thoughts will create a better future for you.

You are the emperor of your life in every way. You are NOT the emperor of anyone else’s life and you can not change them with your own self justifications. It’s not your job, so let go of it, and you will stop focusing inaccurately on that subject.

When you let go of your need to be right, you will naturally allow the flow of life to move in. You will let go of unnecessary suffering. You will return to your own power. Your own experience of that person will literally change.

Something little understood in life is this strange fact. Everything in life, with no exceptions, is responding to your own vibrational set point in the present moment.

When you insist on holding, “They are wrong.” in your mind, then life will prove it to you with examples.

When you insist on holding, “They are doing the best they can with what they’ve got.” in your mind, then life will prove it to you.

Adjust yourself

You only have control over yourself. And I saw this vividly when I realized I was giving so much attention to them being wrong, and worrying about it, in my own mind. Thus causing my own worrisome attitude and unhealthy thought pattern, which was also affecting my health, so I decided to do my own research on health and find the best habits and medicines for me. It was a self inflicted poison that had nothing to do with the other person, and entirely with my own need to be in control and right.

If proving to someone else that they were a fool would cost your well being, would you do it? Ask yourself this question often.


This entire post was inspired by listening to Abraham Hicks on dealing with difficult people and encountering the lessons first hand in my life. My gratitude and thanks to them.

Please feel free to leave a comment below about your own situations and how you are dealing with them.

Thanks for reading.